Transitions

Transitions are part of our lives.  Whether we're transitioning from school to summer vacation, high school into college, college into the work force, singleness into committed relationship (or vice-versa), or work into retirement, just to name a few, we face numerous transitions/metamorphoses/changes throughout our lives.  Some of them, we wholeheartedly welcome; others...well...not so enthusiastically.  Some downright scare us.  Some make us mad or sad.  Some we instigate; others are thrust upon us.  Some are smooth and seamless - often unnoticed.  Some are obvious, and even clunky.  Transitions are everywhere, and they are natural part of the cycle of life.

I think about the transition (for lack of better word) of thought and action for those who directly heard Jesus' messages.  He said he came not to do away with the law, but rather to fulfill the law.  Though he knew, and honored, and respected the Law, he challenged His listeners with his, "But I say unto you..." statements.  His higher and better ways allow us to transition from absolute 'one-ways' to considering all sides of the story and viewing the bigger picture.  Instead of an eye for an eye, Jesus challenges us to turn the other cheek.  Think about it: if we all followed the eye for an eye rule, eventually we'd all be blind.  Jesus knew this.  His suggestion to turn the other cheek is not a sign of weakness or passiveness.  In fact, Jesus' way of thinking and action truly is one of strength, because it is motivated by love.  And not the quiver-in-the-liver kind of love.  But real get-your-hands-dirty, up-close-and-personally involved love.  Love that the Apostle Paul says will bear, believe, hope, and endure.

With the words and actions of Jesus in mind, I think about the upcoming transition in my life.  Suzanne and I are ending one chapter in our lives and beginning another.  We are moving from Hickory to Asheville around the end of June/beginning of July as I will be pastoring a church there.  The transition is full of emotions, and I know that God is calling us to this next chapter in our lives.

God walks with every one of us through our many transitions and cycles of life.  God cares about the details of our lives; I am completely convinced of this!  We humans are such complex beings, yet we are so tiny compared to the planet.  And the planet is tiny compared to the sun; and the sun is tiny compared to the entire universe!  Yet...here we are, facing the beauty and challenges of each day.  We're given opportunities to choose - life or death, blessings or curses, love or hatred, inclusion or exclusion, affirmation or segregation.  God gives us countless opportunities to transition into higher and better ways.  We get to choose whether or not we wish to be transformed - by love.

So Suzanne and I embrace this transition with love.  Oh...I'm sure stress will creep in and try to distract us.  But love that bears, believes, hopes, endures, and transforms us into higher and better ways will always be with us during every transition we encounter.  That, we all can be assured of.  Until next time...

Am I "All In?"

All in.  When I think about the term, and ponder whether or not I am fully committed to my relationship with God, sometimes it's easy for me to say, "Yes.  Of course I am all in!"  After all, I am a pastor.  I have committed to pray, study, teach, lead, and share my life with as many folks as possible.  And I have been so richly blessed along my life's journey.  I have encountered ups, downs, and inbetweens; and people have trusted me to walk with them during their best and worst times.  Together we have seen triumphs and tragedies; we have shared meals, coffee, laughs, and tears.  All in?  Well, yeah...of course I'm all in.

But recently, I got to thinking about some of the "All In" people of the Bible.  People like Abraham and Sarah, Noah, Joseph, Daniel, Mary, and the Disciples.  These folks really were all in.  God asked Abraham if he would leave everything and everybody he knew and was comfortable with, and go.  God didn't tell him where he was going.  God didn't tell Abraham what his life would look like from that point on.  God simply asked Abraham for his trust and participation.

Same with Noah.  "Build a big boat friend, because it's going to rain...A LOT," speaks God.  Noah's anxious response, "Um, okay.  But what's rain?"  God speaks again, "Don't worry, you'll find out."  And find out he did.  Wow!  Again, God didn't tell him how things would turn out or what the details of the journey would look like.  God just asked if Noah was all in or not.

Mary.  Whew!  What can I say about Mary that hasn't already been said.  She's a teen-aged girl and God comes to her and asks if she would be all in.  Mary...thank you!  Thank you for participating in the greatest life-altering, history-changing event the world has seen!  Even though you weren't given all the details and plans in advance, you said yes.  WOW!  Talk about being all in!

Then there's me.  Again, I like to think I'm all in.  But I'm human, like everyone else.  I have my hopes, dreams, fears, doubts, and goals.  And though I seek God to guide and direct me, at times I also box God into my plans for how I think things should look.  In other words, I try to figure God out.  And just when I think I have one tiny part of God figured out, God surprises me.  "Betcha never thought of that one, did you?" asks God.  "Well...I guess not.  Thank you for showing me yet another way of seeing things," I humbly retort.

And that's how I think God is.  God asks us to experience and participate in a relationship.  But, God usually doesn't tell us how things are going to turn out.  And that's a good thing.  Why spoil our life's experiences by telling us exactly what lies around the bend?  Yet, at times because we're human, we get a picture in mind of how we think things will turn out.  That's okay.  We're human.  But we need to be flexible.  And we need to also focus on God and not on the journey, not on the details, not on the plans.  Yes, God wants us to participate, but we can't lose sight of God because we're too busy on the details - even the details of sharing God's love.  Jesus simply said, "Go.  Make disciples.  Baptize.  Love."  How we do these things is up to us, but we still have to keep God at the center of our lives.

All in?  Yeah, I really am.  So I'll remind myself to keep my focus clearly on the one who invites us to, "Come.  Follow me."

Until next time...

The Water of Relationships

During Lent, we at First United Methodist in Hickory have been walking through a "W" series: Waiting, Welcoming, Water, Who, What, and Wow!  This message is the third of the series: Water.  In this message, we discuss Jesus washing the disciples feet.  It's a story that makes me squirm a little because it's a very personal moment between Jesus and the disciples.  And it makes me uncomfortable because Jesus says we should wash others' feet, and, well...that makes me uncomfortable.  I feel like I'm being too up close and personal.  Maybe I don't understand what Jesus is really saying.


Peter, one of the disciples, didn't understand either.  He flip-flops in his attitude between protesting against it and asking Jesus to wash more than just his feet.  What does Jesus really mean?  What does he want for us to do today with this?  Let's dive into the Water of Relationships.

Until next time...

Why didn't I think of this in the first place?

Hello all:

Life's funny sometimes - the way we learn things.  Usually for me, that means in retrospect.  Recently, I wrote that I would post my sermons on my blog so people could go back over them to better digest.  Well...in theory, I guess that's a good idea.  But they get rather long - sorry.  Then it hit me...DUH...get someone to record them and then upload them.  Sorry I haven't thought 21st century for a while.  So as long as I can get people to record the messages, and they turn out okay, I'll go that route.  Plus, now my family can actually see me "on the job."  Hope you enjoy this one from Sunday, February 24, 2013.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4eDoTqVsZoQ

Until next time...

I Don't Fit In

There have been times throughout my life where I felt as if I didn't seem to fit in.  Though I tried to squeeze my way into the popular crowd or with the cool kids, I couldn't deny the fact that I was more like the Charlie-in-the-Box from the Island of Misfit Toys than one of the G.I. Joe cool kids.  For some reason(s), I've tended to focus on what's 'wrong' with me or how I differ from others.  When I was a young boy, I wanted to talk about my emotions; my family didn't.  I lived in the country; my friends lived in town.  I lived in a trailer; my friends had houses.  I had short hair; others had long hair.  When I was finally allowed to grow my hair out, I rejoiced.  Finally, I can be cool like all the other guys.  Until nature showed up with other plans - curly hair!

At 17 years old, while my companions were 'living it up,' dating, hanging out, and so forth, I started my relationship with God.  Don't get me wrong, I'm eternally grateful I have God in my life; but at 17, it wasn't exactly the coolest thing to admit.  I didn't hide it, but I didn't push it in peoples' faces either.  Not until 21.  Then I stumbled upon a group of folks who were like me - other misfits on the Island trying to make it through life.  We all started attending a church together, formed a band, and thought we would tour the world with our keytars and mullets (yes...sadly the hair thing doesn't get better at this point). 

During this part of my life, I let others know about my beliefs.  And here's what I encountered: not too many people thought the way I did.  They really weren't interested in hearing about church, or the band's latest sell-out concert of 13 people, or about the condition of their souls.  Once again, Charlie needed to retreat back into his box and wait.  As I continued with this group of friends and church, life happened.  We never toured.  In fact, the bus we bought, the one we thought would launch us into the realm of uber-cool, caught fire one night as we were finishing the customizations to the inside.  Apparently, varnish for wood floors doesn't go well with electrical wiring on a 1958 GM bus.  Who'd a thunk it?!? 

But here's the real kicker - Now that I was Christian and didn't seem to fit in with the rest of the world, my thoughts and beliefs started changing, too.  And now, not only did Charlie not fit in with the rest of the world, Charlie didn't fit in with the Christian world.  Good thing for the Island of Misfit Toys!  I could chill there for a while to regroup.  And regroup I did!  And life continued to happen.  So much so, that I ended up in NC, remarried, a dad, an old student, and now a pastor!  Wow!  I have no idea what Island all this belongs on.  Maybe the Island of Surprise Endings.

And that's what hit me recently while I was reading.  This is a surprise ending.  I never would have guessed that I would be here - at this time and space in my life.  While reading the book Gifted by Otherness, I came across the following.  This is God speaking: "I made the stars and the planets to obey me.  And I made the angels and all the bright spirits to adore me. But you...I made you to surprise me."  Wow!  We were made to surprise God.  And all along I thought God surprised us - which God does.  But the fact the I am here to surprise God suddenly changes the story.  I am a Charlie-in-the-Box on purpose.  I don't have to try to 'fit in' because I already do.  I fit into God's world where all of us reflect God's crazy, creative, and misfit love.  God loves us so much that God visited with us in order to (re)connect with us.  What did we do?  We killed God.  God continues to visit with us.  What do we continue to do?  Kill God.  We kill God when we think we have God figured out, when we try to make God fit into our image instead of the other way around.  We kill God when we don't embrace our Charlie-in-the-Box selves and try to be what everyone else thinks we should be.  We kill God when we love others, but not ourselves.  We kill God when we try to fit a square peg into a chocolate covered potato chip. 

But God, the creator of we Charlie-in-the-boxes, and all toys, loves us as we are.  God took the time to sculpt us into the marvelous beings we are.  God wants us to understand that.  God loves us where we are, but doesn't leave us where we are.  God desires that we (re)connect with God and with each other.  We fit in because God intends for us to be here.  We matter because God spoke, "Light, air, bird, happiness, Charlie-in-the-box, love, amazement." 

So let us take the time during this Advent season (the time leading up to Christmas) to thank our Toy Maker.  Let us embrace who we are.  Let us embrace love - for God, others, and ourselves.  From one Charlie-in-the-Box to another...Merry Christmas!

Dry Spells, Dry Bones...

Ugh, I hate looking at my blog and seeing my last entry was in July.  Once again I feel like I have dropped the ball and let life get the better of me and my time.  But did it?  Did life 'get the better of me?'  It's true that I haven't posted anything in a while, but there is a big reason.  I've been experiencing a dry spell - particularly when it comes to writing, or simply in trying to get my thoughts in any semblance of sensible and logical meaning.  Dry bones.  My thought process seems like the valley of the dry bones where God placed the prophet Ezekiel (Ezekiel 37.1-14). 

At the moment, I feel like I'm better navigating through the valley, compared to a few weeks ago when the drought seemed deep and overwhelming.  I think I'm navigating better because I'm not consumed by the thought of dry bones taking over.  I recall the conversation between God and Ezekiel: "Human one, can these bones live again?"  "Lord God, only you know."  "Prophesy over these bones...I am about to put breath in you, and you will live again."  And I believe God is breathing into the dry bones of life's present moment.  Once again...life. 

I realize that life has its ups and downs, sowing and reaping, fertile and arid times.  And through all these times God is present.  God is present in the crispness of the morning air that signals the impending autumnal equinox.  God is present when people rally around a family who loses a loved one.  God is present when we accomplish the impossible.  God is present when the impossible seems to swallow us whole.  God is present when we walk through the valley of the dry bones.  God's breath flows through the four winds and touches all of Creation.  God breathes life. 

Maybe time spent in the valley of the dry bones is God's way of inviting us to be still and know that God is God (Psalm 46.10), and to be quiet so that we can hear God in the thin quietness (1 Kings 19.12).  The question is, will I allow my spirit the time to be quiet, especially when it's restless?  When it seems to be yelling at me to 'do something' will I just 'be' with God - not because I need answers or direction or purpose, but just so that I can be with God?  Society screams to us westerners to be producers...doers.  And God wants us to be doers...of compassion, justice, mercy, etc.  But God also wants us to be still and to find the peace that transcends our human understanding (Philippians 4.7) so that our hearts and minds will be guarded from the hot dry winds of the valley. 

Stop.  Rest.  Listen.  Open our hearts and minds.  Take in peace.  Share life when it's fresh and when it's crispy.  Love.  Trust.  Laugh.  Cry.  Be.

Eve's Story

I would like to tell you about a congregant of mine – Eve (name changed for privacy concerns).  Eve is the daughter of a well-known family here at my church.  She just graduated high school and is enjoying her summer break before heading off to college in the fall.  Well…for the most part she was enjoying her break.  Until recently.  See, a couple of weeks ago Eve and her friend were enjoying a warm summer Saturday night in Charlotte.  Lots of people had come out to enjoy the music and outdoor events.  As the evening progressed, a group of what some people might call “thugs” targeted Eve and her friend.  Because of what the girls were wearing and how they were acting, the group decided that they would give them “what they had coming.”  They would “teach them a lesson” they would not forget.  And they did.  They attacked Eve and her friend…in public…with people around…and no one intervened.  No one helped.  Even after the attack was over, people ignored their cries for help.  People just walked right by them. 

Oh…did I mention that Eve and her friend are gay?  They were attacked for merely being in a public setting enjoying the evening.  The group of young women who attacked them decided that they didn’t like their “gayness.”  So they attacked them…in public…with people around…and no one intervened.  No one helped.  Even after the attack was over, people ignored their cries for help.  People just walked right by them.  Until a fellow teenager saw them and used a cell phone to call 911.  The teen sat with the two girls until help arrived.  Although there was security for the night, they did not help.  The incident received no media coverage.  It was swept under the rug as if it never occurred.

When I was contacted by the family, my heart broke.  I know Eve.  I like Eve.  She has a sweet spirit about her – a spirit that has been damaged by others hatred and prejudice.  As I made my way to Eve’s house, my heart was racing because this was something that I was certain that I would not have the right words for.  I was certain that Eve would drop the “God bomb” on me and ask why God would allow this to happen.  Ugh.  What will I say?  I pray the whole way to her house.  I arrive to find Eve and her friend in a heated discussion.  I stand in the background, listening but trying not to eavesdrop.  Then it happens – the “God bomb” is dropped.  But not by Eve, by her friend.  “This is exactly why I don’t believe in God.  Where was your God when all this happened?” her friend drills to me.  My heart sank and my tongue froze.

Fortunately, Eve steps in.  She turns to her friend and says, “You’ve got it all wrong.  The only reason I’m still alive today is because I do believe in God.”  Complete silence fills the room.  Tears well up in all of our eyes.  Through the bitter disappointment, anger, fear, and sadness of this incident, Eve understands God’s grace and is able to put it into words so that all of us can understand and experience God’s grace as well.  Eve offers us her sweet spirit. 

I wanted to tell you Eve’s story for a reason.  And it’s not about what side of the gay fence you’re on.  It’s about offering love and compassion for our fellow human being, helping to end oppression and violence, and speaking up for those whose voice isn’t heard – whether the voices are gay, or homeless, or undocumented, or struggling with addiction, or fighting a mental illness.  It took a lot of brave people to help the Civil Rights movement stop oppression and violence.  It will take a lot of brave people to help end oppression and violence for all who are condemned by society.  But we must keep the words of the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. in mind when he said, “In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”  How can I call myself a friend of Eve’s if I remain silent? 

May Eve’s strength and dignity rise up in all of us.